Im afraid…

I’m afraid that

1. there will come a time that we would tire of each other
2. that we will be bored wth each other
3. we both might change without knowing it
4. we’ll be unfaithful
5. we might be disappointed with each other
6. we might loose things to talk about
7. we might just stick with each other just because of the children
8. we might lose our love for each other
9. we will slowly and unknowingly drift apart

and most of all I’m afraid that
9. you might be too busy with your work that you’ll forget that the reason you’re
working for is US, your family. What’s the purpose of your hardwork if you don’t have the precious time to spend it with your family

The Grinch that Stole Christmas

Wonder why Christmas seems less exciting compared to when we were kids? The downside of being an adult I guess. Kids, find joy in simple things. Adults, well, enjoyment seems kinda complicated. I’m just left here reminiscing the happy and glorious days as a kid, then maybe I can be infected with the Christmas spirit =).

I was always looking forward to christmas when I was a kid for the ff. reasons:
1. Gifts.. gifts… gifts (need I say more?)
2. Santa Claus, we(we would mean the 4 Marino grand daughters) would always hang socks for Santa to fill up, write letters to Santa, put it in the christmas tree and imagine our letters flying up in the air, where it would go to north pole =). My tita would leave cookies and coke for Santa to eat ‘coz you know, he might be hungry from his journey. I would be a very good girl and we would sleep early so santa claus can fill our socks up. We would wake up early with much anticipation, a big smile on our faces and find our socks filled up with candies and coins. The coke would be half-empty and the cookies would be half-eaten. There would be gifts from Santa Claus under the tree, his hand writing would be askew as Santa is getting old so, he does not have much control of his hands anymore (Santa has parkinson’s diay hehe). I remember my Tia Pening hanging a rice sack come morning it was filled up with coconuts teehee. I was also told that once when my mother was a kid, she was a naughty girl that time, so Santa did not give her anything, she was crying her heart out and became a very very very good girl on that day and viola! she received her gift a day later on top of the stairs accompanied with Santa’s letter to be a good girl or else no more gift next year (What can you say, my lola was really creative. LOL). Daria also told me of sending a letter to Santa Claus via Post Office, I can just imagine the face of the post master when he read the “To” sign.
3. My parents at that time worked overseas, christmas was the only time that they could come home. So, I was always looking forward to lots and lotsa pasalubong. I always remember rummaging through their balakbayan boxes, looking for toys, candies, chocolates and lotsa goodies.
4. Hunting for the wrapped gifts, I was always an inquisitive child, so I would search every nook and crook in the house looking for wrap gifts, when I find my name on the gifts, I would shake..shake..shake it and second guess what’s inside.
5. Family get together and manito and manito – this was always a semi-reunion. My lolo would give me 25 pesos worth of shiny 1-piso coins. This would be the time to open our piggybank account (my lola drops coin on it for the whole year).
6. Special Ham (secret recipe from my mother) – Christmas and New Year is the only time I could taste this exquisite ham and has become a tradition for us. I should get the recipe so I could also make it a tradition for my new small family.

I guess the spirit for me broke when I found out the truth about Santa Claus. Due to my inquisitiveness, I accidentally stumbled on some items, I vividly remember a green umbrella with m&m’s look alike candies inside. When I opened my sock to find that same item, of course being the curious kid that I was, questioned the truth about Santa. My mother told me the truth and explained that Santa was in spirit only and would visit them and tell them to put the candies inside the socks. I was surly disappointed, I expected a much believable explanation than that. So there, the umbrella that I found was the grinch that stole Christmas. My brother just found out the truth ’bout Santa 2 years ago and he cried because he really thought that it was true and that his wishes won’t come true anymore. (He wished to be intelligent that time and wished that his tummy can be smaller =)) . I don’t know how he found out but the grinch sadly also stole christmas for him that time. Somehow, after that, Christmas seems to lack the excitement that I was soo looking forward to when I was a kid. We would still hang socks but oh! it just was not the same anymore. After that I did get a bonus. I can now wait for the clock to strike 12 and not be told to sleep early =).

Old Me, New Me

Remember when we were kids? Whenever we had a crush, we would immediately match our name with theirs using FLAMES and CANDLE, though I can’t remember the representation of all the letters anymore. We would immediately append our name with their surname or was this just me?

Now that I’m getting married, I can’t seem to let go of my surname, though I have the option to keep it but as I come from a traditional family and I have a traditional fiance I have no option but to change my surname. I have been named Sintclaire Chavez from the day I was born and becoming Mrs. Sintclaire Daria just seem so alien to me. I roll my tongue and pronounce the name again and again but it just seems so weird. I’m sure that when someone calls me mrs. daria, they would have to shout it to my ear so I would recognize my name. I still think that my original name sounds better (teehee!).

One more thing, I still don’t have a new signature yet, how do I go about this? Am I just feeling nostalgic or what? I can’t seem to let go of the things that identifies me as Me. Changing my name seems like changing Me all of a sudden. I still have 12 days to savor the last threads of my soon to change identity. I should sign every paper I could get hold of, quick! give me a pen and paper so I could give you an autograph.

One more thought:
Will getting married change me as a person, will I suddenly become logical because I’m married or am getting married? I just find this really weird, a friend and also my cousin told me that I now make logical comments so I my comments before were illogical? Bah! beats me…

Why I want to get married

Top 3 reasons why I am looking forward to married life:

1.) Pure, unadulterated Sex (Rated-r ba?)
2.) At last I can sleep well, no more snoring from my tia, no more early morning rantings from random people in the house especially the nags from my mother, no more blaring stereo in the morning, no more “Manang Claire ang akong allowance”, no more “Mata na … kay 9″ when in fact it’s still 7:30 in the morning, –Sigh– peace at last
3. Independence – I can do whatever I want, I don’t have to explain my actions anymore except to “THE” boss, no more nagging when I can’t go to church, no more nagging when I’m always out of the house

Hell Breaks Loose

I’m irritated as hell, as the day is looming behind, the guest keeps on growing and growing and growing. Well, you get my point. “Please add them as they need to be invited”, “oh! I need to invite her/him too kay mauwaw ta”. I have to make additional 15 invitations and the effort My God! the effort and time I have to pour on the invitations. Grrr!!!! Makes my blood boil just thinking of the soon to make invitations. I thought that my stressful days are over but what the f*** it ain’t over yet!